Walking Etiquette!
I know, I know, this is my third post with a title including the word “etiquette.” But really, is existing with other humans soooooo hard for some people?
Here’s my problem: Walking is not a difficult thing to do. It doesn’t become difficult when done in a hallway or on a stairwell or even in a place where other people are walking. This is something you probably taught yourself to do before the age of 1, and decades later still haven’t quite mastered. Are you kidding me?
When you’re walking toward another person in opposite directions, each of you should step to the right. I would have thought this was a universal thing, but every time i attempt it the idiot coming at me either walks directly into me or steps to his left and then we do a little dance which the moron who has gone the wrong way always finds super funny. I don’t get it.
Here’s another thing, when i am walking literally two inches from a wall to my right and you are coming directly at me, I can’t move out of the way. I have nowhere to go. If i am walking as far to my right as I can possibly be then it is your obligation to go around me. It’s just proper walking etiquette. Believe me, if this is the situation, when you walk into me you’re going to have a serious collision with my elbow or my shoulder. If you don’t know how to walk amongst other people I am going to make sure you learn your lesson in the most painful way possible.
Another problem, don’t stop to have a conversation with someone passing you in a narrow hallway or on any kind of stairwell. You better really hope I am not behind you when you do this because I will put my hand on your back and move your ass right along. I get it, I do. You think the world revolves around you and if you want to talk to your homey on the stairs then the world can really wait. I get that. But just because I understand it doesn’t mean I am going to let you behave like a jackass.
The amount of jerks encountered in traffic is more than sufficient to provide me with ample aggravation. I do not need morons who can’t even walk down the street without pissing me off. The above are only a few of the common-sense rules you should be aware of if you’re going to use your feet as a mode of transportation in this world. Among almost everything else that annoys me, these are things that people should have figured out on their own, but until i see some evidence of that I will continue to not-so-politely explain them to everyone i meet.
Added Thursday, June 14th
Category: People
1
John Angelo said:
I was hoping you would have mentioned something about walking speed when in groups. Allow me. I noticed this alot back in highschool, and occasionally when i find myself in the mall – for some reason, when a large group of people is walking together and chatting, they can only do so at no more than half the speed of everyone else who is walking. and like i said this happened daily without fail at my high school. id be trying to get from one end of school to the other in 3.5 minutes, turn a corner and WHAM! a pack of about 12 girls all giggling and gossiping, and walking at toddler speed. clearly their next class was close by. i would have to do that thing where you slow down and go back and forth from side to side looking for an opening to jump through so i could then run (and maaaaaan did i hate running) to class. by the time i was a senior, however, when i happened upon a group of slow moving underclassmen girls it was totally acceptable to simply shout “Move it.” to clear a path. that was nice.
at the mall, i just keep my mouth shut and walk around them. because even though every second at the mall is a second wasted, there’s way less urgency about what time i walk into the store i intend to shop at.
Friday, June 15th @ 4:45pm
2
Andrea said:
Well said, usually my method of getting through groups of slow-moving folks is to shove someone. This is why none of my friends will go to any sort of large event with me. I lose my patience quickly, put my hand out in front of me, and just start blasting through crowds hitting anyone who doesn’t immediately leap out of my way. I feel if you can’t learn how to walk, you really deserve to get hit or shoves by a stranger.
Friday, June 15th @ 9:08pm
3
Dree said:
I agree with the original complaint. walking should be like driving… you walk on the right side. what dont people get, seriously?!
Wednesday, June 20th @ 7:38pm
4
Sherry said:
I thought it was universally known to keep to the right when walking down some kind of isle. That is what I do and yet there are still those people walking directly towards you like you should be one to move our of THEIR way. I don’t think so.
Tuesday, July 10th @ 6:39am