Drawn-On Eyebrows
I’m sorry, but have you had some sort of accident? Cancer patients aside, this is unacceptable. Did you really wax or shave your real eyebrows completely off of your face and then draw them back on in an unnatural location/shape/color/etc.? I can’t understand the motivation behind such an act.
In high school I knew a girl who did this and realized it was a bad idea after someone referred to her eyebrows as “the golden arches,” since she drew them in near-perfect half circles. Now, that was high school, and still most of us knew better. Just days ago I encountered a grown woman who was sporting some oddly shaped and clearly fake eyebrows. I had to have a polite conversation with her, all the while choking back laughter.
How am I supposed to take you seriously when you have clown makeup on your face? How? If you were a clown, a very successful drag queen, or perhaps some sort of very extravagant non-clown performer in cirque do soleil or something this look could be excusable, but chances are you’ve got no excuse. You probably looked in the mirror and thought you looked fantastic. Luckily for everyone, I am here to tell you that you that eyeliner is for your eyelids, brow liners are to fill in your existing eyebrows if they are very thin, and there is not a product really designed for redrawing the eyebrows you’ve removed because YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE DONE THAT.
For anyone who is currently trying to rock this look, I just want to say that every single smiling face you see every day of your life is smiling for the sole reason that it’s the closest they can get to pretending they aren’t trying their hardest not to have a laughing fit at your expense. Just shade them in in the right place, they’ll grow back in a few weeks.
Added Sunday July 8th


